Sonny on Deck
by iamkiley
Summary: So Random! and MacKenzie Falls are on the SS Tipton while Zack & Cody are at 7 Seas High.
1. Chapter 1

"Mr. Moseby, we didn't do anything!" Cody said hastily when he saw the hotel/ship manager.

"Dude! At least wait until he accuses us!"Zack slapped his brother in frustration.

"Oh, no. What havoc have you reeked on my ship this time?" Mr. Moseby didn't sound too pleased.

"No, I was talking about Bailey and me. Zack is the one that was playing baseball with your vases."

Mr. Moseby's eyes opened wide at the words 'baseball' and 'vases'. He attempted to speak, but stuttered; "vas-vase-vases?" He fell backwards onto a cushioned chair, suffering no damage.

"Good. Now that he's out of the way, we can have some _real_ fun!" The twins hi-fived before running off to who-knows-where to do something that required a knocked-out manager.

--

"Wow, guys, the SS Tipton is so big!" Sonny was being her usual, bright, happy self as the cast of _So Random!_ boarded the ship.

"I love everything about this place! Especially _him_." Tawnie twirled her hair and strolled over to where 'him' stood.

'Him' noticed Tawnie's flirty attitude and returned it. "Hey, babe. I'm Zack and I'll be your tour guide for today. First off, let me show you my wallet and a dinner for two. Tawnie giggled like a fool and grabbed Zack's outreached arm.

Meanwhile, Sonny was still frozen in awe of everything except _him_. Sonny's 'him' was a very different person than Tawnie's 'him'.

"Chad Dylan Cooper."

"CDC: that's me." Chad said before he realized who had addressed him. "Sonny?"

"Chad." Sonny spat. This jerk throb was not going to ruin Sonny's week.

"Sonny."

"Cha-"

"Enough! Although I love to hear you say my name-"

"Your point?"

"What are you doing here and why'd you have to bring your laughing pals from Chuckle City?"

"Why are _you_ here?"

"I asked you first."

"I asked you second."

"Chad Dylan Cooper answers to no one!"

"Fine."

"Fine!"

"Good!"

"Good!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"Good! Let me have the last word and I'll tell you why we're here."

Chad opened his mouth to make a comment, but thought better of it. _This is the only time I'll ever do this for Sonny!_

"We're on this boat to do some sketches for the vacationers." Sonny was back to her bubbly self, "_So Random!_ is gonna rock!"

"MacKenzie Falls is going to rock more!" Chad argued.

"Really, Chad, really?" Sonny folded her arms across her chest.

"Yeah! I mean, on TV. We're just on vacation right now."

"Good to know."

"So we're good?"

"We're so good."

"Good!"

"Good!"

"Fine!"

"Bye!" Sonny turned on her heel and walked away smirking.

--

"Hey, Zack, I've been looking for you. Where ya' been?" Cody asked his brother, not expecting the answer he was given.

"I had a date with Tawnie Hart." Zack replied casually.

"No way!" Cody sarcastically added, "Is Godzilla here, too? How about our pal Big Foot?"

"No," Zack said matter-of-factly, "But _So Random!_ And _MacKenzie Falls_ are. Dude, I already got Chad, Sonny, Portlyn, and Tawnie's autographs!"

Cody peeked at the paper that Zack had thrust in front of him, but there were only three names there.

"Where's Tawnie's?"

Zack looked into his brother's eyes, "Do you really wanna know?"

"Um…no!"

A hand patted Cody's shoulder, but it wasn't Zack's. Tawnie Hart stood three inches away from Cody and said coolly, "Good answer."

Bailey walked over to where she saw Cody standing with Zack. "Hey guys!"

Her eyes finally saw the hand that was still rested on Cody's shoulder, and a pang of jealousy swept over her. When she realized who it was, all was forgotten.

"You're – you're-"

"Pretty!" Tawnie offered.

"Tawnie Hart! I love _So Random!_"

"Oh, stop it." Tawnie was enjoying the praise that she believed she rightly deserved.

"You are the prettiest one on the show!" Bailey squealed.

"Go on, don't stop!"

"Sonny is a close second. But she is the _funniest_! I loved that farm sketch!"

Tawnie felt herself begin to burn. _I'm the prettiest and the funniest and the cutest and the…prettiest!_ She felt like crying. And because Tawnie Hart does whatever she feels like doing whenever she feels like doing it, she did cry.

"Don't make her sad! Cody, keep your girl away from mine!" Zack realized what he said just as soon as it was said.

"Your girl? Cody, do we have to do this again?" Bailey had a slightly angry, slightly amused look on her face.

"No! I didn't say anything about that!"

"Okay I believe you." Bailey laughed.

--

"Come on! You know you want to!" Sonny laughed, pulling Tawnie into the water.

"I'm – I'm – I'm wet!" Tawnie bawled, but then realized that she was having fun.

XxXxXxX

Nico and Grady, along with their new friend Woody, sat in the hot tub.

"This is the _life_." They said simultaneously.

"Hey, you want to hear me fart classic rock?" Woody asked.

Nico and Grady looked at each other, then back at Woody. "Heck yes!"

XxXxXxX

"So you like pranks _and _ventilation shafts?" Zora was defiantly having a great time on the SS Tipton. "Awesome! Now it's time to unleash my awesome pranks!"

"Great! When do we start?" Of course Zack was in on it with Zora; they were the perfect match when it came to mischief!

"Tomorrow morning, 7 am, sharp."

"Works for me."

"Now, I have one question for you." Zora said dramatically, "Where is the bathroom?"

XxXxXxX

"What do you want to do?" Portlyn asked London, who had dragged her all over the ship.

"Talk about how great I look! Yay me!" London clapped and Portlyn was beginning to rethink this whole trip. "Or we could go shopping. You need to get out of those hideous clothes if you want to be around me."

Then again, this could be fun. _Wait, what did she just say about my uniform?_

XxXxXxX

_I am James Conroy. James Conroy should have a date tonight! So why am I…alone?!_

"Hey there babe. You busy?" James tried to get a girl, but it didn't work.

"I'm married." A small child popped out from behind the woman's leg. _Strike one._

"You don't look old enough to be a mom." James smiled his sickeningly deceitful smile.

"You don't look old enough to be hitting on a 35 year-old." _Strike two._

"Ooh, that hurts. Do you know who I am?"

"Yes, I do. You're the kid who fell overboard and drown. I'm so sorry." _Strike three, you're out._

XxXxXxX

"So, Bailey, what do you want to do?"

"I don't know, Cody, what about you?"

"Well, our Science projects _are_ due in 4 weeks…"

"I'll help with yours. Let's go!"

XxXxXxX

_Chad Dylan Cooper is no fool. Something's up with Sonny, and Chad Dylan Cooper is going to find out. Chad Dylan Cooper is – stupid! Nothing is going on with Sonny! She's too much of a goody-goody. Chad Dylan Cooper…needs to stop referring to himself as 'Chad Dylan Cooper'. What am I thinking? If CDC wants to call himself Chad Dylan Cooper, then he will. _

Chad's phone vibrated in his pocket, and he answered it before looking to see who was calling.

"CDC: speak to me."

"Really, Chad?"

"Sonny?"

"No, it's Portlyn." She sounded offended. _What do I care? I'm Chad Dylan-_

"So, you wanna see something cool?" Portlyn's voice interrupted Chad's thoughts.

"It depends, does it have something to do with me?"

"No."

"Then bye." Chad hung up the phone and let his mind wander.

It wandered all the way to home. His real home, not the Hollywood home. The home where mom was gone most of the time, and dad would always be on the phone. The home which Chad never wanted to go back to. He shook off the thought.

As a new thought entered his mind, Chad grinned. He whipped out his phone and dialed Sonny.

He saw her climbing out of the pool to reach her mooing phone. Chad rolled his eyes.

"Hello? What do you want Chad? I can see you."

"And I can see you. I just wanted to say hi."

"Hi?"

"Yep. Hi."

"Whatever. Bye."

"No!! I have to say bye and hang up first!" Chad could only get away with being immature with Sonny. Good times, good times.

XxXxXxX

"Aah! Marshall, your cast will do well for our comedy night."

"Oh, thank you Mr. Moseby, sir. I'm glad that we could be here."

"Just make sure that they don't break anything. I already have two devious twins roaming about my boat." Mr. Moseby shook his head.

"I understand completely, sir. My cast will cause you no trouble."

"You had better hope so."

_What was that supposed to mean?_ Marshall asked himself.

* * *

**Hehe :-)  
**

**Pairings: Sonny/Chad, Cody/Bailey, Tawnie/Zack, James/London. **

**I might include the following: Portlyn/Woody, Nico/OC, Grady/OC, Zora/OC.**

**Friendships: Nico/Grady/Woody, London/Portlyn, Sonny/Bailey, Zora/Zack.  
**


	2. Chapter 2

_Chad Dylan Cooper, here. Speak if you must._

BEEP

"Chad, its Sonny. But you already knew that, jerkthrob. I can see you. Oh, and by the way, your shirt has a stain on it."

Sonny put her phone away and rolled her eyes. She felt her face turn red as she watched Tawnie with her new boyfriend, Zack. Past them, she saw Chad Dylan Cooper whisper something into another girl's ear. They were so cute together that it made Sonny want to barf up her breakfast.

As much as Sonny hated admitting it, Chad _was _pretty heartthrob-ish.

Just as she was thinking this, Chad looked her way and winked. Sonny really didn't know what to think of it. _Is he only doing this to make me jealous? Sadly, it's working._ She remembered their 'confessions' on the set of Chad's movie. _Oh, god._

_She'll dump him before noon – no one can stand his conceit for more than a couple of hours._

--

"Hey, you want to grab a bite to eat? They have the best steak I've ever tasted." Chad winked again, but it was directed at his date instead of Sonny. He wrapped his arm around the girl's waist.

She frowned. "Don't you remember? I just told you that I'm a vegetarian."

"Do you really expect _Chad Dylan Cooper_ to remember those things? I can't be bothered with your food preferences. I have more important things to do! I only said 'yes' to you because of Son-"

Chad obviously didn't mean to let this slip out, but he couldn't take it back.

"'Son', as in, Sonny Monroe? The new _So Random!_ girl? You jerk! Her?!" The girl grabbed a cup from the tray a waiter was carrying. She tipped it above Chad's head and let out a frustrated grunt when nothing came out.

"You know, Hannah-" Chad started.

"Anna." The girl said through clenched teeth.

"Anna, it might help if there was some sort of liquid in that cup."

Anna threw the empty cup at her date's head and stormed off, probably to cry in her room. No one likes to reject Chad Dylan Cooper, even if he enjoys rejecting them.

"You managed to hold onto her for longer than I thought."

Chad turned around to see Portlyn standing with her arms crossed. Behind her, Chad could see Sonny standing in the same position as Portlyn, evidently finding it funny.

Just seeing Sonny there made Chad ashamed of himself. She had that effect on him.

He was in desperate need of a comeback. "Wait, you actually thought? That's a big step for you, Portlyn."

She put a hurt look on her face. "Maybe I'm not as stupid as you thought, Chad. _Maybe _I'm just a good actor."

"Oh, sure." Chad rolled his eyes.

"Really? At least I'm _good_ at hiding who I like. For an actor, you suck at hiding your feelings for _you know who_." Of course Chad knew who Portlyn was talking about. He couldn't get her name out of his mind.

_Sonny Monroe_

But he also had to keep his reputation as Hollywood bad boy.

"What makes you think that _Chad Dylan Cooper_ has a crush on _her_?" He whispered.

"Well, for starters, why would you waste all that time arguing if she meant nothing to you?" _God, she's observant._ "What about your movie? Were those things you said _really _not true?" Portlyn began at a whisper, but her voice gradually rose with every word.

Chad rolled his eyes again, but he was getting nervous.

"You text her more than anyone else _and_ you used this date to make her jealous!" Now she was practically yelling.

"Ssshh! She'll hear you!"

"It worked."

"Huh?"

"_She's jealous._"

Chad smiled.

--

"You got everything? The fishing pole?" Zora asked her partner in crime.

"Check," came Zack's reply.

"AA batteries?"

"Check."

"Toilet plunger?"

"Check."

"Feta Cheese?"

"Check."

"Mr. Moseby?"

"Che – hey!"

"Meet me in the vent leading to the kitchen."

"Gotcha."

--

Cody could hear people shouting all the way from his room. "Sonny!" and "Chad Dylan Cooper!" and "Omigosh, Tawnie Hart!" rang loud and clear. Of course, Cody _was _testing an ultra hearing devise through his porthole. The five foot long tube stuck out of the room and traveled up the side of the boat. He turned a knob on a controller to move the devise to the left, where he could hear better.

The headphones on his head slipped and he pushed them back up. Cody heard the voice of his friend, Bailey, and he decided to listen in on her conversation.

_It's not eavesdropping, it's science._ He kept telling himself this, but didn't believe a word of it.

"What do you see in that over-achieving nerd?" He heard an unknown voice say.

Apparently, she was talking about him. Cody frowned at the name he heard.

"Hey; I'm an over-achieving nerd, too." Bailey said.

"But it works for you."

"I'm sorry if you don't like Cody, but he's my friend. Get over it."

"Why are you getting all defensive? Oh, I get it: you _like _him."

There was a pause, "No," Bailey said.

"If you say so."

"I do."

Bailey was rejecting Cody without even realizing it. The over-achieving nerd was crushed.

"Plus I already have a boyfriend. Don't tell anyone, but me and Jack are dating."

_I hate Jack!_ Cody thought. _Wait, who's Jack?_

--

Sonny couldn't believe that Chad and Portlyn were arguing, loudly, about Chad's feelings for her. Portlyn thought that Chad had used the date to make Sonny jealous. She must have guessed correctly, judging by the redness of Chad's face. _Two can play at that game. I've got to make him jealous._ Sonny began hatching a plan.

"Sonny!" Her thoughts were interrupted by a fan running up to her.

"Yeah?" She smiled.

"Can I have your autograph?"

"Sure. What's your name?" Sonny grabbed the picture and pen that the fangirl had thrust in front of her.

"Bailey Pickett."

"I like it. I know a guy named Bailey."

A smile spread across Bailey's face, "So do I."

--

Grady sighed. "So many girls, so little time."

"Yeah; and none of them said yes!"

Nico plopped onto his bed and let out a groan. "What's the point of even trying?"

"At least we have him." Nico and Grady looked across the room at Woody, who was inspecting a booger at the end of his finger.

He looked up at his new friends and grinned. "What are we doing today?" Woody unknowing stuck the finger in his mouth.

"I was thinking about getting something to eat, but I'm not hungry anymore." Grady said, disgusted.

"Hey, we could practice our sketches some more," Nico suggested.

"Uh, no."

"The show's tomorrow night!"

"Fine."

"Fine!"

"Good!"

"No, no, no, no, no! We are not going to do that."

"Right, we've seen too many of Sonny and Chad's arguments."

Woody, still sitting in the corner, just said "Huh?"

--

"Portlyn, wait for me! I can't run in these heels. They might break." London said, chasing after her shopping buddy.

Portlyn abruptly turned around. "You know what you need?"

"I know what _you_ need. A manicure."

Portlyn ignored her comment. "You need a boyfriend."

She scanned the crowd for potential boyfriends.

A skinny, pimple-faced boy wearing thick, round glasses stood to the left of London. He was talking to a skinny, pimple-free girl wearing thick, black mascara and eyeshadow. The girl didn't look too pleased to be associating with a person who matched his tie and knee socks with his shoelaces and suspenders.

_London wouldn't be caught _dead_ with him_. Portlyn thought.

Chad Dylan Cooper, Portlyn's self-absorbed cast mate, was inspecting his hair in a nearby mirror. He brought a comb out of his sleeve and combed a stray hair back into place, smiling at the reflection.

_Puh-leeze, as if he'd date anyone as self-praising as London Tipton. Besides, he likes Sonny._

Portlyn spotted another one of her cast mates, James Conroy, on the Sky Deck. He was holding a smoothie cup and smirking at something. His hair was neatly gelled, and Portlyn thought that London might like him.

"James!" Portlyn cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled. He turned and, seeing Portlyn, hopped down the stairs towards her.

James had guest starred on Mackenzie Falls for a few episodes, and the season ended with him permanently joining the cast.

"Yeah?"

"London here wants to know what our show's about." Portlyn cocked her head to one side, "But I really don't know. I just memorize the script." She shrugged her shoulders and waved good-bye.

London blinked. Has there ever been a time when she was in the presence of a cuter guy? Well, maybe once. But not a cute _actor _guy.

"To tell you the truth, I don't know what _The Falls _is about either." James began, "Mackenzie and his girlfriend are trying to run my character out of town, but Mackenzie's evil twin brother stopped them. Then Jazmyn hit her head on the kitchen counter and fell into a coma. Now Mackenzie has to save his town from the mad scientist, Berty, who is obsessed with world domination. Does any of it make sense?"

London, who had never even heard of _Mackenzie Falls,_ nodded.

James continued, "But enough about the show. I want to talk of things such as…" He paused partly for dramatic effect, and partly because he needed to decide if London Tipton was a good catch. "…_you_."  
London may not understand much, but she understood that James what's-his-last-name wanted to talk about _her._

London knew that she was supposed to form some sort of a response, but she couldn't even think to say "Yay me!"

Instead, she told the actor, "I go to school here."

--

"On a scale of one to ten, how pretty am I?"

"11."

Tawnie giggled.

"On a scale of one to ten, how hot am I?" Zack asked playfully.

Tawnie answered in a whisper, "Nine."

"I can deal with that." Zack shrugged. He scratched his head, "If I started wearing clean underwear it'd be a ten."

Tawnie closed her eyes, "You don't…?" She shook her head furiously, "Ew. Ew, ew, ew, ew! Tawnie Hart does _not _date people who have hygiene issues." She stood up and began to walk away from the couch she was sitting on.

Remembering her manners, Tawnie turned and said, "Goodbye, Zack."

It took him a few minutes to produce a response. "What'd I do?"

--

_Peace out sucka!_

Chad's voice rang in Sonny's mind. Those words were so Chad-y. No one in Hollywood said that, except for Mr. Hollywood bad-boy Chad Dylan Cooper. He'd do anything, short of shaving his head or wearing Mickey Mouse ears, to stand out in a crowded place.

Sonny rolled her eyes and tried to remove all thoughts of the _Mackenzie Falls_ star from her mind. She picked up an issue of Tween Weekly that was laying on the floor in her cruise ship suite and flipped through its pages.

The door opened, and in walked a fuming Tawnie Hart.

"That b-" She began, and Sonny held her breath, "b – b – butt head!"

She broke down crying as Sonny replied calmly, "If you're talking about Chad: I agree."

"No! Zack has needs to take care of his _problems_."

"I don't even want to know what you're talking about, so vent to," She pondered, "Someone else."

Tawnie's face paled. "You don't look so good," Sonny observed.

The color in her face returned as she scoffed, "Thanks. You don't look too snazzy yourself."

Even though it was only 9 o'clock, Sonny was already in her pajamas; white silk with yellow suns embroidered all over. _Of course_ Tawnie wouldn't like them.

"I meant that you looked sick."

"I meant what I said. Even _I_ would only look average in those! Well, maybe a little bit pretty."

"Ok, whatever." Sonny was hurt by Tawnie's words; she liked her PJs! But Tawnie's put-downs weren't enough to down Sonny's sunny spirits.

A muffled 'moo' came from under the bed's pillow. Scrambling to reach it, Sonny knocked her magazine onto the floor. "Oops."

She grabbed the phone and picked up the magazine, frowning.

The page had flipped open to a page with a picture of Chad Dylan Cooper and Joe Jonas. It was a quiz titled 'Who is your Hollywood Boyfriend?'

Ignoring it, Sonny checked her phone.

A squeal made its way out of her lips, startling Tawnie.

"What? What?" She demanded.

As she silently shook her head, Sonny grabbed an outfit and rushed to the bathroom.

Tawnie heard the door's click and immediately reached for the childishly decorated phone.

Sonny had received a text message.

It's a date. C u there.

_Sonny has a date?_ Tawnie thought to herself, _With whom?_

Her eyes ventured to where the sender's name was displayed. She half expected to see 'Chad Dylan Cooper' on the screen, but was shocked at the name she did see.

_**Cody Martin**_

**

* * *

Well? What do you think of it? Too much? Not enough?**

**For the next chapter, I'm gonna write about Sonny and Cody's date (and the events that led up to it).**

**Also, I need ideas for the chapter after that, which will be the **_**So Random!**_** showing on the SS Tipton.**


End file.
